Envisioning a project comparing images of Filipinas in fiction, Denise Cruz was concerned about one particular hurdle: All of the books on her reading lists were written by Filipinos—men not women. Supported by a three-year Ford Fellowship, Denise had the time to do "significant archival research," and —what do you know—she found plenty of Filipina authors "people didn’t know about," publishing both short stories and novels.

Denise found herself "checking out books from U.S. libraries that no one had ever checked out before—they were tucked away in boxes somewhere." One was a fictionalized autobiography of an American woman of mixed Filipino and Irish heritage who joined the guerrilla movement in the Philippines during World War II.

The woman warrior is not at all like the Filipinas often found in Filipino literature of the mid-20th century, their image taken from Maria Clara in Noli me tángere, the founding nationalist text of the Philippines. National hero and novelist Jose Rizal’s character gave birth to "the cult of Maria Clara," Denise says, and a long succession of idealized women: chaste, modest, and self-effacing.

On closer examination, Denise says, other kinds of women appear in Filipino fiction, however. For example, in his highly regarded Scent of Apples, Bienvenidos Santos depicts not only "Maria Clara" figures but also "some women who have gone to the United States to become educated, who speak English and talk openly about dating," Denise says. These women, however, are seen as "suspicious characters."

Indeed, Filipino literature from the 1920s to the 1950s—published both in the United States and the Philippines—features "a lot of anxiety about `the new Filipina,’ who has been irrevocably influenced by the U.S. colonial presence in the Philippines,” Denise says, and that anxiety seems to be intertwined with the Filipino struggle for independence.

Asian American literature is often viewed as starting in the 1970s and 1980s, when the Asian American population grew with the easing of immigration quotas. Also, the focus is "almost always linked to the Asian experience on U.S. soil," Denise says. She hopes "to shift the boundaries of critical discussion a little bit," including an earlier time period and looking at works published or set in the Philippines as well as those published or set in America.

Toward that end, she used a foreign area studies grant this summer to visit the Philippines, where she searched libraries, had conversations with Filipino scholars about her research, and took advanced Tagalog. A happy side effect of her graduate studies in English is that Denise has learned the native language of her parents, Filipino immigrants who "are absolutely thrilled" with this outcome, and she has become better acquainted with her own cultural heritage.

Those goals were not on her list as an undergraduate at UCLA. Although Denise was an English major, she nevertheless applied to medical school, a longtime plan. She recalls being interviewed by a surgeon who asked why she wanted to be a doctor. "I gave my rehearsed answer, and I could see the fog growing over his eyes," Denise says. "I said to myself, 'This man doesn’t believe me—perhaps I don’t believe myself.’" So instead of going to medical school, she got a job as a mentor and teacher for Americorps in San Francisco’s Chinatown.

Soon after Denise’s return to UCLA, this time for graduate work in English, she made an important ally. La’Tonya Rease-Miles, also a graduate student in English, "made it a point to introduce herself and to check in with me on a regular basis," Denise says. It was La’Tonya—also a Ford Fellow —who told Denise about the fellowship and encouraged her to apply. At the time, Denise had been reading Filipino literature as preparation for her qualifying examination in comparative literature, and so it made a convenient topic for the research proposal she needed to write for her Ford application. Happily, it also provided the kernel for her dissertation. Denise expects to spend about two years on the research and writing, then look for an academic position where she can continue her studies while teaching what she’s learned.

In the meantime, she is working part-time for La’Tonya as a graduate mentor in the Academic Advancement Program, which Dr. Rease-Miles directs. Denise made other contacts with Ford Fellows at a national conference in Puerto Rico, "by far the best conference I’ve ever attended. You’re invited to become part of this network of colleagues," she says, "a Ford Fellow for life."

Published in Fall 2005, Graduate Quarterly